The Empty Swing

An empty swing,

times gone by,

an empty swing,

memories in mind.

That empty swing,

sad and sweet,

so happy and lonely,

remembering old times.

The wind gusts by,

swirling autumn leaves,

around that empty, lonesome swing,

where my memories again find me.

Bitter sweet, soft and near,

I smile, I cry, by that swing,

as childhood and youth slip by,

and on goes forever the routine so dear to life.

C.S. Lewis

"I didn't go to religion to make me "happy." I always knew a bottle of Port would do that. If you want a religion to make you feel really comfortable, I certainly don't recommend Christianity."

Stand Up!!!

 "Growing up rather sheltered, you wouldn't think I would have run into any need to fight. And I didn't... much. But throughout my childhood, there was a reoccurring incident in which another child would attack me and I ran every time. I wasn't a coward. I even recall times when I did some things particularly dumb to prove I wasn't, including jumping into a yard with a really mean rottweiler in it to retrieve a toy that belonged to my friend that ended up in that yard. Luckily the dog wasn't there. (I was young!) For some reason I never understood and still don't, I had to apologize. Maybe it was for trespassing. I guess that was it. But that's besides the point. The point is, running away was the appropriate and right thing to do at that time. It kept my hands clean and blameless while the other got into huge trouble. Besides, I was small and not particularly strong, affectations my opponent claimed for herself. I did have one talent, though, and that was getting away without getting hurt. I guess I just developed an intuition that told me when it was going to happen. By the time I was nine, those incidents died away and were passed off as passions of a child. Fine by me, but the memory of never even once standing up for myself haunted me. In my opponent's eyes, I was weak, a pushover. I could ignore her passive aggressive remarks just fine - which took the place of physical aggression. She could push and push and try to make me respond and I wouldn't budge, but neither would I push back. I wasn't afraid! But it just didn't occur to me that that could possibly be the right thing to do. No one told me that, no one manipulated me into believing that I couldn't stand up for myself. As a young child, however, "standing up for myself" and "getting into a fight" got mixed up in my mind. Ever after, I'd fantasize stopping her. Fighting back. Not letting her tread on me ever again! Now, I was bigger, I was stronger, I was smarter. Whether all those statements were truthful or not, they were what I told myself. The anger festered and grew without my even realizing it was there. But if it ever happened again... if it ever happened again. And it did happen again. I didn't even know I was angry until I realized she was jumping at me with her hand outstretched to slap me. Who could have thought that the whispered word NOW could be so stock full of meaning.  It didn't matter whose fault it was or what I should have done, that less than a millisecond told me more about myself than hours of thought could. NOW you can prove yourself. NOW you can put into reality all your fantasies. NOW you can have revenge. NOW is the time. It was most likely the shortest fight into the world, if it even counts as one. I countered her and she ended up on the ground - I never was quite sure if I pushed her there or if she fell - and then I shouted, 'Stop it! I can hurt you. I can hurt you now!' Her older sister stepped in, then the parents. No one was in trouble. I don't really know why. You'd think a fourteen year old attacking her fifteen year old friend for irritating her and being "uncontrollable" (and I quote) over the weekend was a bit more worthy of a good talking to than when a four, six, or eight year old did it. But that's not for me to say, it was quite enough for me to decide I no longer wanted to live under this. I may not be allowing her to bully me into doing things, but that's still not the same as not letting her bully me at all. My mind was made up, I needed to respect myself and stand-up for myself. I consulted my parents and a mentor, explaining what I wanted to do, and asking for the best way to do it. Two weeks later, I gently broke the news that it was time to go our separate ways. I wasn't angry when I told her. I was sad. We had many great memories and in a way, I knew I could spend the rest of my life putting up with it. But that was stunting my growth and hers.
Am I proud of myself for fighting back? You know, not really. The satisfaction I thought I'd feel wasn't there at all. I reacted out of anger and the past. But my choices afterwards to respect myself I am fully proud of. I made the hard decision to stand up for myself. And you know what, we had many mutual friends, and I know that between me and her, many of them are going to choose her. But now I've had a chance to grow, build new friendships I couldn't before, and respect myself.
I know it sounds selfish to say you need to put your health first, but it's not. How can you grow into the person God has made you to be if you are letting someone suck it away from you? And how does that benefit the other person at all? It's true they may decide to go down the tube and blame you for it, but now, they are taking you with them unless you let them go. Who knows, they may realize the consequences of their actions and turn around. Whatever the case, fighting because you don't want to be weak or a coward is weak, but standing up for yourself - even if it requires some fighting - is healthy and good!"

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You're worth it!

-Lynsi Keye

Alice Walker

"No person is your friend who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow."

Oops... Quote!!!

So, I realized I missed the quote of the week. Oops... so,to foreshadow the upcoming blogpost on Monday, here is this quote (and the one on Friday, will do the same.):

"Friendship isn't about whom you have known the longest... it's about who came and never left your side." - Anonymous

9-11

Two Towers came tumbling down,

the billowing black ash fell all around.

Cries raised, tears hit the ground,

but above it all was another sound.

A sound of a nation together,

raising prayer up to God,

a sound of heroes to remember,

none of whom the other way did run.

But into the black smoke they ran,

into the chasm of death ,

because their hearts were bigger than their fears,

now in honor and peace they rest.

9-11 we'll remember,

9-11 heroes forever

Veterans, citizens, and family members,

This is one nation under God together.

-----

In honor of the heroes who gave their lives fourteen years ago and three days ago.

- Lynsi

Cool Kids - by Echosmith

Not sure if you've heard the song "Cool Kids" by Echosmith. She has a very pretty voice and the tune is pretty awesome, too. The lyrics... eh... the lyrics.

Chorus:
"And she/he/they say/s,
I wish that I could be like the cool kids,
'Cause all the cool kids, they seem to fit in.
I wish that I could be like the cool kids, like the cool kids.
I wish that I could be like the cool kids,
'Cause all the cool kids they seem to get it.
I wish that I could be like the cool kids, like the cool kids."

     It makes me sad to see that many of my peers fall into one of two categories: 1) Kids who think they're it and all that matters. 2) Kids who don't think they're it, but are obsessed with those who are.

     There are, however, obvious "secrets" that are often overlooked and I do have sympathy for.
1) A large percentage of the "it" kids suffer from the same insecurities and self-hate the "not-it" kids suffer from and feel like they are walking on a tight-rope, always on the brink of falling out of the "in" crowd.
2) Both the "it" crowd and the "not-it" crowd are being lied to. They're whole world revolves around their social lives and status, so naturally, it seems to them to be everything that matters. That's their world! People - children and adults alike - are notorious for being simple thinkers and having terrible foresight. It always feels like life is a destination and now is it, rather than a journey and every place is transitory. They don't realize that in a couple years, no one is going to give two cents about it.

Verse 1:
"She sees them walking in a straight line, that's not really her style.
And they all got the same heartbeat, but hers is falling behind.
Nothing in this world could ever bring them down.
Yeah, they're invincible, and she's just in the background."

    From this verse I learn several things. One, this verse could mean a thousand things. Two, from what I gather, "she" sees a contrast between her style and the "cool kids" style. Because their style is not her style, naturally she is dying on the inside when she tries to be like them, which is why her heartbeat is falling behind, because she's not being who she's supposed to be. I'll get back to the last two lines.

Verse 2:
"He sees them talking with a big smile, but they haven't got a clue.
Yeah, they're living the good life, can't see what he is going through.
They're driving fast cars, but they don't know where they're going.
In the fast lane, living life without knowing."

     Just take "they haven't got a clue" completely out of context and Boom! A little bit of truth! Truth that the "not-in" kids don't see and that many of the "in" kids feel acutely, but don't understand. They do not have a clue. Take the last two lines, and Ba-bang, some more truth! They may just be in the fast lane, but if they don't know where they are going life's going to take them places they don't want to go. Tough luck.
     This verse demonstrates a very prominent lie that has partial roots in wrong perspective. "Not-in" kids think that the "in" kids have it great. "They're living the good life." From the stories I've heard to my own life to my friend's lives, this is not true! I have a friend, she is an extreme extrovert and comes across as happy and secure. She seems to know everybody and have a great social life. She seems "in" in a nerdy, home-school way. When I got to know her a bit, I learned - to my shock - that she suffered from a lot of insecurity and belief that she was not "in" at all and that she was being rejected.
     I think a lot of kids suffer from this. She was comparing herself to the other "cool kids" who I am sure from indirect observation and stories I've heard suffer from insecurities as bad, perhaps worse, than her's including self-harm, self-hate, vanity, materialism, and trivialism.
     A personal example. In the past, I came across as the girl who's got everything together, totally secure, and blah-blah-blah. I still come across so much like I've got it all going, that when I fall apart and tell my sisters how broken I've been feeling, they are stunned and tell me they thought I had it all together. I think that a lot of other kids who appear to have it going don't really and they know it.

"Nothing in this world could ever bring them down.
Yeah, they're invincible, and she's just in the background."

     About that... no one in the real world is going to care if you were popular for the first seventeen/eighteen years of your life. Let me clarify, for the next 50,60,70 years of your life, no one cares if you were a "cool kid," an "in" kid, or a "not in" kid. They do however care about the education more than half put on the line to be "in" - successfully or not - for the first twenty years of their life, after which it's obsolete. They do care if you can work hard, work as a team, and have life skills. And, believe it or not, they care if you know yourself, because if you know yourself, it's easier to give the best you can give. If the first seventeen years of your life were spent pushing who you are away so you could be somebody "acceptable" for the "in" crowd, then you will be struggling during the very important years of your young-adult life trying to figure that out and what you will do in the future.
     The kids who took their education seriously and cared more about becoming who God wanted them to be and learning how to be secure in their identity and not be swayed by everyone else will be legions ahead! And most likely, they'll be successful. I can't tell you how many adults have told me they wish they had realized this and had foresight when they were young and how different their lives would have been.

     Before I close, I want to say that I don't hate "in" kids nor do I hate kids "looking in". In fact, some kids are "in" on accident or just happen to be good at it. And it's natural to want to be what seems to be the "thing" the "it". It is human nature, but it does have a cost whether it's normal or not!
That's what bothers me; the cost. Don't sell your youth, your self-esteem, and your identity to be "in"! Be yourself. "In" is constantly changing and in the next few years, no one is going to care, and you'll be left with the scars of everything you did to be "in". The obsession of being "in" from "in" kids or "not in" kids is what is my big pet peeve, because it's such a waste of oneself and the scars and hurt never go away from believing the lies. People are taught to invest in now only forgetting that now only last for now and they have a long future coming.

     It is quite a bit of a bummer, because I really do like her voice and I love the beat of the song and the instrumental just doesn't cut it. Even the lyrics were done with talent. It sincerely captures the emotions of many youth today. Oh well.

Anonymous

"Anxiety happens when you think you have to figure everything out. Turn to God. He has a plan."

Airport Inspiration

If you are looking for writing inspiration, pause the next time you take a flight. I know you're in a rush to be on time to your plane and that irritated, begrudged feel towards all the hassle easily overtakes. But take a moment and let the thrill of adventure flow through your veins even if you've done this a thousand times before. Open your eyes and observe. Acknowledge the hundreds of stories, the protagonists, antagonists, and supporters walking by. Observe the little girl running off the plane, squealing with delight to embrace her sister. Wonder how long they've been apart and why. Observe the mother with her daughters, walking wearily off. Watch the father rolling his baggage, carrying his young son on one. Observe the young man exit confidently and the young couple lovingly. Ask yourself who they are. Ask from where they come and to where they go and why. Observe the greetings and partings. Note whether they seem to be familiar or foreign. See some come off with loads of baggage and some that come with none. Ask if, why, where, and when. Perhaps you'll find a story waiting for you. Even if you never do, remember what you see and hear, because maybe if your character finds themselves here like you, they can experience all of it, too.